How To Use Your Feelings To Build Self Confidence

Your feelings affect literally everything you do in life, and everything that happens in your life - especially your self confidence levels and self esteem. You create feelings and emotions about everything that your senses pick up, and you create an immediate and automatic reaction to everything that happens to you.

When you eat something that tastes absolutely divine, you immediately feel pleasure and joy and want to enjoy continuing eating it. When your nose picks up a really bad smell, you immediately express revulsion and want to get away from the smell as quickly as possible.

In everything that happens to you, your emotions and feelings immediately come into play and automatically determine how you react to each and every situation. There are several different groups of feelings and emotions, and they control us in very different ways. So let's look at the primary groups because by being able to recognise them, you can learn how to deal with and control them - instead of the other way round.

The first group we'll look at are commonly referred to in NLP and painful feelings.

Imagine for a moment that you're having a relaxing hot shower. You've been stood there for a while and really starting to unwind. Suddenly the hot water runs out, and you're left standing under icy cold water. You yell out in shock and immediately try to get away from the water. This is classed as a "painful feeling" (though it doesn't actually cause you any serious harm - more a shock than anything), and you immediately try to get away from the cause of it.

The first type of painful feelings is anxiety. Anxiety can be a very debilitating emotion, and is also non-specific. By that I mean that you can be feeling very anxious about something, but not really know exactly what is causing your anxiety symptoms. You're feeling apprehension, dread, uneasiness and distress, but not sure why.

Anxiety can be very severe - and can certainly be strong enough to wake you from a deep sleep or cause an anxiety or panic attack. It is usually caused by an accumulation of many smaller fears and worries that combine together to create overwhelming emotional stress. In stronger cases, it can cause you to be uncertain and incapable of positive action. In most cases it also has a negative impact on your self esteem and reduces or even wipes out your self confidence.

How Pleasurable Feelings Affect Us

Where we strive to move away from negative feelings, we will constantly try to move towards pleasurable and positive feelings. Anything that makes us feel good is something we want to continue to experience is much and as often as possible. Imagine you've been away on business and haven't seen your partner all week. The end of the week has arrived and you're on your way home. The first thing you want to do when you see your partner again is give them a huge hug. It's a feeling we enjoy and crave, so want to experience it as much as we can.

Given the choice, experiencing positive emotions is the way we would like to feel pretty much all the time - that's how we are programmed as human beings. We want to feel good and enjoy the emotions that go with happiness, laughter, love, fulfilment, friendship, being loved, inner peace

Pleasurable experiences make us feel good, and we feel good on the outside, we feel good on the inside, and our self confidence and self esteem grow immensely. The trick is to control your emotions so that you always feel positive about the things that happen to you in every day life. When you're in complete control over how you react and how you feel, your emotions will always be positive, and your self confidence and self esteem will soar.

Lorna Luck is a self confidence and personal development coach . Here she talks about how your feelings can help with building self confidence levels. She offers a free program teaching how to build confidence at magic-hats.com

Article Source: http://www.c3careerarticles.com

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